Conrad’s blog

This morning Conrad sat up on the floor by himself really confidently, playing with round, plastic stacking brics, Jessica’s new Duplo Lego and any other things he could reach. He only toppled over every so often, and very slowly, when he’d over-reached for something, but stayed sitting for 5-10 minutes at the time in-between. This is a definite improvement from before Christmas (not that he got much practise during the holidays), when we had to sit behind him, lightly propping him up with our legs, as he tended to lean and topple in all directions. Won’t be long now before he’ll sit on his own really well to play and we can dispose of the baby bouncer for good (I’ve put a half-full hold-all as counter balance on the legs, as Conrad still tends to reach for his feet, which makes the whole thing fall forward…).

Ian has been home all week and it’s been so great to have all this family time just the four of us. We’ve gone out for walks in the mornings, to the park and then food shopping, with Conrad falling asleep in the back of the pushchair for his morning nap. Yesterday, however, Conrad didn’t want to settle and was crying more and more desperately. At first we thought he was just over-tired, as he had been awake since 4.30am. But his crying came in waves and was more intense than usual, he fell asleep but only for about five minutes before he woke and started crying again. This was so out of character, that we started to think that he was suffering from pain, maybe a stomach ache. At home, I gave Conrad Calpol (baby paracetamol) and some milk, and after I’d carried him around and sung to him for a while, he calmed down.

We had an appointment with an estate agent to view a 3-bedroom house up for rent at Langshott, in Horley about 15-20 minutes walk from where we live, so took a chance and put Conrad in the pushchair again, hoping that he’d fall asleep properly this time from us being out for a walk, and he did, quietly snoozing away as we checked the house out from the outside and then met up with the guy from the estate agent and viewed the house inside. (The house was horrid, by the way: as soon as we came in we spotted the storage heaters and single-glazing, and then everything we saw after that just confirmed that we certainly would NOT be moving to this place…!) On our way home, though, Conrad woke up after having had only about 30-40 minutes of sleep, crying desperately again. Ian took the slow route with Jessica, letting her amble at her own pace, while I hurried home with Conrad in the pushchair.

At this point it had become time for Conrad’s lunch but as he was so upset, I didn’t even contemplate offering him solids but gave him another bottle, and eventually he allowed himself to switch off and have some sleep. This week I’ve noticed that having the dehumidifier on in our bedroom when I lay Conrad in his cot for a nap seems to make him calm and settle him much quicker, and I made sure to have it on this time. He slept for an hour, woke up being quite delicate and needing calming down at general intervals. Ian had been out with Conrad’s Aunti Wendy, taking stuff to the dump and she stopped by for a cup of tea, playing with Conrad, who needed comforting every so often but was getting decidedly more cheerful as the afternoon progressed. I’d noticed – and Ian and Wendy agreed later – that whenever Conrad burped or threw up a little, he cried, as if he was suffering from heartburn. I dug some baby Gaviscon we’d bought for Conrad in the early days but never used, as him being sick hadn’t seemed to bother him then. As it happened, Conrad seemed absolutely fine by the early part of the evening, even played happily by himself in the play ring whilst the rest of us had our tea – the medication needed to be given mixed with a bottle of formula, but come bedtime we decided not too worry.

Since coming back after Christmas, as I’d got into the (bad, but intentional) habit of giving Conrad a bottle every time he woke up and made a noise in the night – for fear of him waking Jessica and her then keeping all of us awake for the rest of the night – instead of letting Conrad cry/moan for a bit to see if he’d resettle by himself, it felt like we went back to square one regarding Conrad’s night feeds, with him waking up every 2 to 3 hours and not settling again after he’d had a bottle feed. When I’d discovered the connection between Conrad settling for an afternoon nap and the dehumidifier running in the room, I did think to try that during the night too: sadly, it hasn’t worked so far (of course it wasn’t going to be THAT easy to crack that one…!). Saying that, last night Conrad only woke up once during the night, at half past midnight, and then didn’t stir again until 6am. So maybe we’ll get to feed-free nights after all.

Gabriella

Conrad’s first Christmas, first time on a plane and first time in another country… Ian and I were both excited and apprehensive about the whole thing but had decided that it had to be done.

Packing wasn’t perhaps quite as organised as it could have been, but with two little kids who need a lot of things up until the last minute it turned out to be necessary to save a lot to be chucked into our cases in the last minute on the morning of our outward journey. One thing we did though, was that Ian made sure to put a little bit of everyone’s clothes in each suitcase, so just in case one of our bags went missing, it wouldn’t be a disaster.

We arrived at Heathrow in good time but weren’t allowed to go through to airside until an hour before our flight was due. Not so great if you’ve got little children that you need to feed lunch and change nappies on before you board, and especially take though security. They really don’t want families with little children to travel, do they? Apart from taking off all our coats, emptying pockets and putting all our hand luggage on the belt, the kids needed to get out of the pushchair, which needed to be folded up and put through the scanner too. Shoes and belts had to come off (tricky when your holding a little baby who can’t stand on his own or trying to hold on to a little toddler who wants to run off and explore…).

I had to taste all of Conrad’s milk for the journey (we had only taken enough for the journey over, as any other packets of liquid, including baby formula, would have to be opened and tasted anyway, which would have spoilt any milk by the evening anyway) and Ian had to open (i.e. break the hygenic vacuum seal) and taste all the baby jars in his bag in front of a security officer too. But instead of being sensitive to the fact that we had two little children to tend to (and making the reasonable assumption that with two kids in tow, there probably actually was baby formula and baby food in respective bottles and jars), the officers made Ian wait by his bag before they searched it, even though they were clearly just standing there chatting. At which point they of course took absolutely everything out (which Ian had packed neatly and logically for quick and easy access during the journey), so Ian then had to pack it all over again. We made the flight in time, but having to rush it a bit at the end, wishing they’d allow families with small children longer for the whole process of getting from landside to gate.

On board the plane, we made ourselves comfortable in a row of three seats in the middle of the plane. We had paid for Conrad’s sister Jessica to have a seat of her own, even though she’s still under 2, as we just couldn’t imagine her sitting still on one of our laps for the duration of the flight. And probably because of her being so excited for most of the flight, Conrad didn’t sleep for much more than half an hour. He spent a lot of time standing up on my lap looking around with a big smile and wide-open eyes, and got a lot of smiles in return from fellow passengers and happy comments from the cabin crew. Across the aisle from Conrad and I sat a couple (he was English, she Swedish, and they lived in London but were flying over to spend Christmas with her family) with a little girl, not many months younger than Jessica, who got very interested in Conrad, who in turn giggled and smiled back at her, while bouncing up and down on my lap. That Conrad’s sunny disposition makes so many people smile and take an interest is absolutely lovely, and we’re so proud to have such a smiley and sociable little boy, even though he’s only 6 months old!

The flight went really well and both kids behaved themselves so well, although everything around them was new and strange, and they’d had to wait a long while in the terminal building and could have been both frustrated and fed up. We were especially impressed by Conrad, who didn’t get to walk about or play with any toys all day, but didn’t grumble about it one bit. When waiting for our luggage at the conveyor belt at Arlanda, it was obvious that they were both really tired, though, sitting very still and quiet in their pushchair. And that’s where our good luck ended. As we had flown from Terminal 5 – guess what…? They still hadn’t sorted out the new terminal’s teething problems with getting luggage on planes. ALL our three suitcases had gone missing…!

What could have been a fun adventure, with license to go shopping nice new clothes, toiletries, maybe a new shaver and new fragrance and make-up, etc., using insurance money, felt like a nightmare standing at Arlanda airport, with darkness and cold blustery snow outside, two little tired kids who were ready for dinner and bed, with the hire car still to go on a transfer bus to fetch and then the car journey to our destination, with no pyjamas for the kids, no formula for Conrad, etc. And when we, after filling in forms and trying to find out as much information as we could at the airport information desk, together with several other worried parents of small children (there had been nine children on that flight and seven infants…!), finally found ourselves with the hire car on a dark and freezing cold car park, trying to fit car seats that we had no idea how they were supposed to be fitted and no light to see properly by and no instructions, and Conrad crying and crying desperately (and he never normally cries like that, so it felt very bad…), because he was hungry and cold and confused now, and we had no formula to give him because that was all in those suitcases still sitting in some loading bay area at Heathrow, then I must admit Ian and I cursed and regretted making the journey at all.

Things obviously improved from then on!

(In progress.)

Gabriella

Last night Conrad slept from 7pm (as usual) through to 4am, when I gave him a bottle. He then took a couple of hours getting back to sleep – not crying but mostly moaning and making tired noises – but it’s promising still. Until he sleeps through the night properly, though, we won’t think about moving him out of our bedroom and into Jessica’s room, which they’ll share until we get a bigger place.

With regards to weaning, Conrad now has baby porridge (an organic mix of four grains including quinoa and millet) with mashed banana for breakfast, and veg with couscous, rice or quinoa followed by fruit and water for lunch and dinner, and – I’m pleased to say – no formula with either meal (apart from what’s mixed in with the breakfast porridge). I have mixed in yoghurt, cottage cheese, full fat milk and creme fraiche with his food a couple of times now, so he has had dairy too. He has already had his first curry, very mild of course: parsnip, carrot, peas and red lentils blended with basmati rice and a bit of cumin and coriander.

We put our Christmas decorations up today, Ian and I and Conrad’s Auntie Wendy, while Conrad and his sister were having their afternoon naps, so it was a bit of a surprise for them when they were brought back downstairs: twinkling lights and baubles around the shelves in the living room. Conrad’s eyes were attracted to the twinkling lights at first but he soon seemed to get used to them, in the same way he seems to accept most things he comes across – I guess everything is new to him anyway. Will be interesting to see what he makes of his first Christmas, though most likely it’ll pass by mainly unnoticed by him.

Gabriella

As Conrad turned 6 months, we wanted to have him weighed again. I took him and Jessica over to the health visitor clinic on the Wednesday (10th December). He wriggled a lot on the scales – in a curious, wanting to look around himself kind of way – so the display wouldn’t settle on any specific figure, but as it showed just above and below 10 kilos (22lb), the health visitor decided on that for the record.

As this meant Conrad ended up very high on the weight centile graph, the health visitor suggested checking his length too, which I was more than happy for her to do (only wish they did it every time!). Through joint efforts – me holding Conrad’s head between the palms of my hands (and chatting to him to try to distract him) and the health visitor trying to catch one of his kicking legs for long enough to stretch it out with his heal against the length chart – the health visitor managed to pronounce him 74cm (2ft 5.1in). So he’s now officially in 9 to 12 month size clothing…! The conclusion when weight was compared to length was that Conrad’s nicely in proportion, so no need to worry there.

As I hadn’t met this particular health visitor before, when she asked if Conrad was breast or bottle-fed, I told her about Conrad’s tongue tie and pulled-back chin. She suggested going to see a speech therapist, just to have his chin assessed by a specialist, to see if there might be any future implications relating to Conrad learning to speak later on. She said it’s probably likely that the therapist would turn around and say that everything was fine, but if there was anything that could be done now to prevent a potential problem later wouldn’t it be better to know? Ian and I think Conrad’s chin looks absolutely fine now, and I’d relaxed about it and not really thought about any potential future consequences, but she had a point of course. The speech therapist she recommended has a drop-in clinic for one hour twice a month in Three Bridges, though, so we’d have to see how soon we could get there.

Conrad’s so keen on walking (still holding on to our hands of course), he giggles and stomps excitedly whenever he gets the opportunity to. Yesterday he walked all the way from the far end of the living room out into the hallway to see what Jessica was doing (she was stacking soft toys in both pushchairs) – wobbly and slow, but determinedly – and giggled excitedly when he came up to her. Sometimes he looks at his sister with such a delighted expression on his face, reaches for her, and when she looks back he laughs really happily.

He reaches his feet really well now when lying on his back, curls up to a little cute ball, though he’s not quite putting his toes in his mouth yet. No doubt that will come soon. He’s not keen on lying down nowadays, but certainly practises grabbing his feet when he’s on the nappy changing mat or sometimes in his cot too.

Gabriella

So we’ve reached that day which is almost as big as a first birthday: the 6 month day…! Time has gone so quickly; but at the same time it’s like he’s always been with us.

Conrad’s better from his cold now, thankfully – his bad cough carried on for ages, it seemed, but he’s been free of it for a couple of days now, and his nose isn’t runny anymore either. He’s stayed chirpy throughout, so hasn’t been suffering much from it.

One thing that changed, though, sadly, was that from having had 4-5 days when Conrad wasn’t waking up until some time between 4 and 5 am and then, after a feed, went right back to sleep and slept for another couple of hours, he reverted back to waking up every 3-4 hours during the night, not settling again unless he had a feed… Last night, though, he had a feed at 11pm but then didn’t stir until just after 5am, when he was mumbling for a little while but went back to sleep again all by himself and slept for another hour…

So I’m hopeful, but we’ll just have to see how it goes. At the moment, I’m too tired in the middle of night to try any clever strategies – first I leave him for a bit to see if he’ll resettle by himself, then I pick him up to see if I can soothe him back to sleep by just holding and rocking him gentle, but when 10-15 minutes have passed and he just seems to be getting more agitated, I simply give him some formula. After that, he’s much happier: either dozes straight off to sleep or chirps away happily and sleepily in his cot for up to 20-25 minutes before he drifts off again.

As Conrad’s reached 6 months, I’ve started him on the next stage of the weaning process. Yesterday I mixed in a bit of finely chopped pasta with a red pepper, tomato and parsley (the Vitamin C in the peppers help absorb the iron in the parsley) sauce for lunch and gave him pureed mushroom and pea risotto for dinner (both followed by plain fruit). Incidentally, the rest of the family that were at home at the time had the same food (though the less mushy version…). Conrad was hesitant at first, but as long as he keeps opening his mouth I let him have another spoonful, so he had a fair bit of both dishes. About halfway through the risotto he was giggling away, so it can’t have been all unpleasant…! Felt very pleased about cooking both meals from scratch, though it’s time consuming of course, and I will have to try to store food up for him in the freezer to thaw out when needed.

Gabriella

Last Thursday (27 November), while he was lying on the floor as I was dressing him to go out, Conrad rolled over to his front for the first time. And then he just kept rolling over the rest of the day. He rolls to his left side, so left to his own devices he would probably roll around and around in a circle – once when I had put him on the doubled-up mats in the bathroom while I was changing Jessica’s nappy (sometimes I change the kids ‘conveyor belt’ style, feels pretty efficient: ‘okay, that’s you done – next!’) and I had to keep shifting him back because he kept rolling over to his front, then to his back, then his front, etc., but all in the same direction towards the laundry basket.

It’s really exciting that Conrad’s ‘achieved’ another little ‘milestone’ and that I was there to see it happen – I’m so afraid sometimes that I’ll be too busy with the both of them, or too tired, to notice when important little things like that happen.

He’s stronger sitting up now, but not quite steady yet – left on his own, he slowly leans further and further over, mostly forward, and then would topple. I try to give him a bit of practice every day, especially since he seems to enjoy it (although not quite as well as standing up).

This morning I took Conrad to the doctor’s again. We’ve all been suffering from a cold, including a bit of a cough, but Conrad’s cough seems to have got worse over the last few days and his breathing quite noisy, especially yesterday and last night, so I wanted a professional to listen to his chest to make sure his lungs and airways were okay. I worry doubly, as I’ve got a bit of asthma myself since childhood and because of the problems of damp and mould that we’ve had in our house… (Although I’ve been told that asthma ‘can’t be diagnosed’ until the age of 2 in children, though I’m not sure why that is…?)

But a medical student (a different one to last time) and then Dr Greengrass again (I have to mention her name now, since I seem to be seeing her constantly, and she’s now started saying: ‘hello again, haven’t you grown?’ to both kids even if she just walks past us in the waiting room) said that although Conrad’s breathing sounded noisy, it wasn’t down in his chest and there was nothing to worry about – it tends to sound more noisy with infants anyway, apparently.

Gabriella

Gabriella

So, a quick run through of how things are progressing so far:

Conrad’s having three meals per day now. I didn’t mean to rush him in any way but he has been really keen, so I’ve just carried on offering him new things and a little bit more every time. As an example of what he eats now, today for dinner he had one ‘ice cube’ sweet potato mixed with one ‘ice cube’ parsnip, plus 1.5 ‘ice cube’ cooked apple for dessert. Just have to say though, to anyone who hasn’t taken part in weaning a baby and is wondering how on earth they can make such a mess when it’s the grown-up holding the spoon: well, at about the same age as weaning starts, babies seem to go through a stage of wanting their arms and legs to get involved in everything, and trying to feed a baby puree is really a test of how well you can dodge flailing arms, kicking legs (nothing aggressive, it’s all excitement!) and those little hands grabbing the bib and shoving it in baby’s mouth at the same time as you’re trying to get in there with a spoonful of runny, sticky and usually very brightly coloured stuff…

Last Wednesday, Conrad deliberately was walking, one foot put in front of the other, for about a meter across the living room floor over to the control panel toy – I was holding him upright, of course (he wasn’t walking all by himself) by his hands with his arms at about elbow height, but his feet and legs moving were all him. I’m still amazed at how strong he is (though do wonder whether the wiring in his brain is all there yet to actually let him start walking by himself any time soon).

When it comes to sleeping, Conrad now falls asleep fairly easily in his cot for a daytime nap. When he rubs his eyes, pulls or rub his ear or starts cranking a little bit (and it’s been 2-3 hours since he last slept) I tuck him in in his cot (he’s very good at kicking his blankets off, so they have to be pushed right in under the mattress) and it usually doesn’t take him longer than 5-10 minutes to go to sleep. Sometimes he complains a bit about being in his cot, so I don’t leave him for longer than 4-5 minutes before I go back to show him I’m still around, maybe to pick him up for a cuddle to calm him down if he’s a bit upset. So far I haven’t had to go back a second time. Night time, I put him straight into his cot after he’s finished his feed so he’s tucked in while still awake. He doesn’t complain about it, though a few times he’s been chatting and kicking excitedly for a little bit before drifting off to sleep.

In the bath he sits very upright now, and looking much happier than when he was lying back – he even beams at me with his lovely smile now and then, instead of the previous slightly hesitant look. Hopefully he’ll start to really enjoy bath time. I put one or two bath toys in with him now and he reaches for and grabs them, so it’s not all just boring wash time.

A few photos from when we were staying at Conrad’s farmor and farfar last week:

Gabriella

On Saturday the 15th November we had a naming party for Conrad. Well, it was more of a welcoming party, perhaps, as we didn’t have an official ‘celebrant’ or similar and didn’t make it very formal. Ian and I had also decided to keep numbers small and only invite close family this time, as we wanted to make sure that arrangements didn’t run ahead with us, stopping us from giving the kids as much attention as we’d like them to have – after all, it was Conrad’s day and not ours. Conrad’s farmor and farfar kindly lent us the use of their house as party venue, as our house the week before had been treated (again) for rising damp, as well as mould, and we’d realised that we wouldn’t have been able to get it reasonably straight in time.

We had a wonderful time, and Conrad seemed to be enjoying himself too. Although he didn’t get a nap all afternoon (he couldn’t really switch off with everything going on around him, even when put in his temporary cot upstairs, which he had slept well in during the week, when the whole family had camped out in farmor and farfar’s ‘granny flat’ to escape the works in our house in Horley), everyone were saying how well he coped.

After everyone had arrived we had a buffet, followed by cake: as we’d decided on the very simple theme of blue and silver – with balloons, table cloth, paper plates and cutlery to match – I’d decorated those with blueberries and tiny silver balls. Then we gathered in the living room for Conrad’s farmor to say a few words, Auntie Wendy to read us a Winnie the Pooh story, which was a lovely idea – she sat cross-legged on the floor with a big book on her lap and told us how Winnie the Pooh got his name. (Conrad’s sister Jessica was shrieking happily throughout the story-telling, but I think most of us heard most of it…!) And then of course we toasted our little Conrad, in some lovely sparkling wine from the local vineyard Denbies.

Ian, I and the kids stayed the night to save us from having to dash home to Horley for the kids’ dinner at 5.30 but most of our guests had left by the time we started getting Conrad and his sister ready for the night at 6pm. Farmor Diana’s cousin Rita and husband were the last ones and they’d left by the time the kids were in bed. There had been a few people missing that we had loved to have seen at the party, but aside from that, I don’t think it could have gone any better than it did – Ian and I were so pleased with how it had all turned out!

Gabriella

After the wonderful night when Conrad slept for over nine hours, he had almost a week of waking up every three hours throughout the night (although he did go back to sleep almost always straight away after a feed) and I was starting to feel a bit despondent again. But then lately, he has only woken up once a night, sometimes after as much as 7 hours’ sleep. I’m a bit at a loss on what to do to help him settle back when he cries in the night apart from giving him a bottle: e.g. stroking or cuddling him or changing his nappy doesn’t help the slightest. I just have to hope that he learns to resettle himself at some point – broken sleep can’t be great for Conrad either in the long run.

In the day time, Conrad still has a morning nap of anything between 1 and 4 hours, usually around 3 hours. In the afternoon I’ve started to put him in his cot when I suspect that he’s tired (unless we’re out and about – then he just dozes off in the pushchair if he needs a nap) and three times now he has fallen asleep there, once even without any kind of cranking, just happy chatter that gradually went more quiet until he drifted off. It’d be nice in a way if Conrad could sleep wherever whenever, but at home it’s safer for him to nap in his cot when Jessica and sometimes other toddlers are around.

Of course Jessica and any visiting toddlers don’t mean any harm, but they don’t always look where they’re going, and Jessica can get a bit overexcited around Conrad. She finds him fascinating, loves pointing out his facial features (I always keep a very close and slightly worried look when she points at his eyes, but she has learned to point them out at a slight distance), grabbing his feet (sometimes a bit hard), burying him in toys (Conrad isn’t always overly keen when toys get stacked right in front of or on top his face, funnily enough…!) or pat his head (sometimes a bit hard too, when she gets carried away). So I’ve decided that if he can be safely tucked away upstairs to sleep in peace, that’s the better option. In the afternoon he can sleep from half an hour to one and a half. I’m not expecting regular eating and sleeping times for quite some time yet, or they might not ever happen (and I’ll be forever guessing whether he’s tired or not…).

Conrad does get bored at times. A few days ago, I decided to try a few of Jessica’s books on him to see how he’d like them, and it went down really well! I chose a couple with good contrast in the pictures – one has coloured shapes which he looks at more that the black and white images of other babies on the opposing page, the other has bold colours and textures. He reaches for the pages, tries to grab the images and sometimes gets a very firm hold on the side of the page. Both books are cardboard ones, and I really have to struggle to keep the pages open and steady: he’s so strong, but obviously not yet in complete control over what his hands and arms are doing.

Conrad has taken to sucking his thumb every so often. It’s not when he’s about to go to sleep or at any other seemingly regularly occurring occasion – maybe his thumb is just another fun thing to chomp on and he’ll get bored of it after a while. We’ve never given Conrad a dummy, but if he chooses to suck his thumb instead, so be it.

As today was the Wednesday nearest to Conrad’s 5 month day (Sunday the 9th), I took him to the health visitor clinic to be weighed. He’s now just under 9 kilos: 8.96 kilos (or 19 lbs 11 oz). At home in the early evening, Ian got the tape measure out and we checked Conrad’s length too: 71 cm (2 ft 4 in).

Gabriella